Monday, October 11, 2010

In the Name of Transparency.

A long, long time ago...I started a blog in the name of transparency. Since then, it has much become a mirage of adoption and faith posts, interspersed with funny "youth-pastor rants".

But, today? I thought I would go back to transparency. Because, today? I'm not doing so good.

As you may have read, we lost our best friend, Norman, on Friday. Since then, the pain my heart feels is constant and the tears are almost always just below the surface...Please, please. Don't ask me how I am doing can't handle what erupts.

Norman was so much more than a "pet" to us. Probably because we don't have any children yet...but mostly because he was so faithful. Norman was the first "married-decision" The Husband and I made together (You should have seen us trying to NAME him)...

Yes, The Husband was overcome with this immense desire for children within, like, three weeks of matrimony. I, on the other hand, worked 60 hours a week and wasn't so sure the "timing" was right.

So, we got a dog.

Every young couple should start with a dog. It's a learning curve.

But we were lucky. Because this dog? Was the greatest dog to ever grace the earth with his presence.

This dog? thought we walked on water. And let us know. Daily.

This dog? would follow me wherever I went...Which was especially comforting when I was storming off after an argument...It was like confirmation that I was right, to have Norman following my trail. 

Everyone wants to be right.

This dog? Wanted to please us so much that he would literally hold his breath to be quiet if I was (quite irrationally ) yelling at him for "breathing too loud"

This dog? Was our comfort when we were sad.

He was our friend when we were lonely.

He was our affirmation when we felt "no-good"

He always knew what I was thinking, And He always knew just how to make it better (Story here).

He was faithful.

And I miss him, terribly.

And things just won't be the same without him here, with us. 

No, he wasn't "just a pet." He was family.

And we loved him deeply.

Puppy Norman, his first Christmas. No, he wasn't a Christmas puppy..Just a really good sport =)
Cuddled up in our favorite blanket.
Playing around during family pictures in 2008.
Such a good sport, even letting me put a shirt over his already-hot fur coat.
On a walk (a SHORT walk) on a camping trip to Sequoyah National Park
Sleeping in. Yes, this IS how he slept most nights.
Love you forever, Poopy-dog.
 Thanks for bearing with me, ya'll.


Ashley said...

I'm hurting with you Ashley. I know how hard it is to lose a pet! I'm really sorry.

Jen said...

All I can say is Booooohoooo Booohoooo Booohoooo hooo.....:(
Like I said before...its a very deep ache and the only thing that helps is time...lots of time.
I will pray for God to comfort you, because I know He is the only one who can.
Love you sweetie!

Rene' said...

its true time helps, but he will always hold a special place in your heart and if u are like me, will be brought to tears if u think about him for too long even years from now. I still miss Lexie, honestly nothing really helps, but time does make it bearable. hang in there, we are so sorry.

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